The last three signs you might lack healthy boundaries

A lack of boundaries is not always immediately recognizable. It can appear as relationship or communication challenges when in fact, it’s a lack of boundaries, that is causing problems.

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This is the last post in my 12 Signs You Lack Healthy Boundaries series. Did you notice any shifts in your perception? Are any of these indicators present in your current experience?

If you haven’t read my last blog posts, you’ll find them here:

12 Signs You Lack Boundaries (Part One)

The next three signs you lack healthy boundaries (Part Two)

Three more signs you lack healthy boundaries (Part Three)

Awareness is the first step in fixing your boundary issues. Too often, people are unaware that they have any boundary issues; they know something is off but can’t connect it to a lack of boundaries. That’s not you anymore :-).

Here are the last three signs you might lack healthy boundaries:

1. You are passive-aggressive.

Autsch, this one hurts to hear. I’m sorry, but I must express this openly. Awareness is the first step in healing and fixing boundary issues. And you’re not a bad person if you notice this behavior in you. First, you let others take advantage of you. Then, you try to gain power by manipulating them and getting back the energy you lost by giving away too much without any exchange. This manipulation looks like complaining, nagging, or blatantly demanding (even pushing a little bit is still demanding, even if it’s masked in an intention of only wanting the best…yeah, I know you know what I’m talking about). 

2. You wonder who you really are.

You were so busy fulfilling other people’s expectations that you don’t know who you truly are anymore. If you cater to other people you might not know your deepest desires and needs anymore. It’s time to shift the focus back to you.

3. You’re afraid of being rejected or abandoned. 

These fears stem from childhood. You had a caregiver who didn’t provide unconditional love and support. You needed to behave a certain way to be granted love, support, and community. Or you learned these behaviors through a parent who was pleasing all along, to keep the peace, to make things work, or to show how much they cared. And this is the way you learned how to show love (I know you know this already, but there are much healthier ways to show you love and care!). 

These were the 12 signs that indicate you might lack healthy boundaries. Did you notice any of them in your life and behavior? I’d love to know. What’s most frustrating about it? Send me an email and let me know. You’ll get an answer from me with some tips and much encouragement – promised. 

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I'm Nadja, your new self-love friend.

As a recovered people-pleaser, I know how frustrated you feel when you care for everyone else but yourself. I've learned to set healthy boundaries and prioritize myself to create the life I want to live (not one where I comply with other people's guidelines). I'll show you exactly how to build YOUR life - the way you want to live it (and yes, boundaries play a huge role in that!) Start living unapologetically and totally YOU.

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If you had the proper role models to learn from, setting healthy boundaries would be as natural as breathing. If you didn’t, don’t worry, you can absolutely learn how.

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