12 Signs You Lack Boundaries (Part One)

It might not always be obvious that the cause for your relationship or communciation challenges is a lack of boundaries. To help you clearly identify whether you need to set a boundary or improve your communication skills, I share with you 12 signs that indicate you might lack boundaries.

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This article is the first out of a series of 4 in which I share with you 12 signs you lack boundaries. Here are the first three signs that indicate you might lack boundaries (you’ll find the next three in the next blog post here if you’re curious). If you recognize yourself in these signs, you’d better check your boundaries because you might lack them. Not having proper boundaries has a lot of negative side effects and I want to share the 12 most common signs with you and sensibilize you to recognize a lack of boundaries in your life. So, here we go:

1. Sign you lack boundaries: Your relationships tend to be complicated or dramatic. 

The less you set healthy boundaries, the more your relationships are complicated. Boundaries are like rules in traffic. The red light might stop me and make my journey take longer, but as we all agreed to stop when the traffic light is red, it’s for this agreement that I arrive safely at my destination (and all others, too!)

It’s the same in relationships. Your boundaries are your rules, and they tell the other person how you want to be treated, what kind of communication you accept, and what you won’t tolerate. If you miss these rules of behavior, you’ll probably experience disrespect, challenging communication, and some kind of manipulation in your relationships. 

2. Sign you lack boundaries: You find decision-making challenging.

You’ve spent so much time of your life doing what others want that you’ve lost your sense of self. That means you often don’t know what you want or what you don’t want. Faced with a decision, you’re blank. Additionally, doing what others want from you might leave you wondering if you ever deserve what you secretly want (the answer is yes!). 

3. Sign you lack boundaries: You really, really hate to let other people down.

People without proper boundaries tend to go along with other people’s plans. You worry so much about letting other people down that you say “yes” (even if you’d rather say “no”.) This is what we call people-pleasing. But don’t worry, I can show you exactly how to stop people-pleasing and start pleasing yourself. 

If you want to identify your biggest block to setting healthy boundaries that protect you, your time, and your space while at the same time bringing you closer to others, then I’ve something for you. I offer 1-on-1 intensive coaching sessions of 90 minutes where I help you identify your biggest block to setting healthy boundaries and explore with you together how to overcome this block. That enables you to set boundaries that bring you closer to others and feel good doing so. The 90-minute intensive is yours for €149,- only. The session is recorded, so you’re not disturbed by taking notes. And you can review and repeat as much as you need. You can book your intensive here:

Book your 90-minute Coaching Intensive here by clicking this link.

You’re on the fence? Get in touch with me here and shoot your questions at me. I’ll get you all the answers you need.

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I'm Nadja, your new self-love friend.

As a recovered people-pleaser, I know how frustrated you feel when you care for everyone else but yourself. I've learned to set healthy boundaries and prioritize myself to create the life I want to live (not one where I comply with other people's guidelines). I'll show you exactly how to build YOUR life - the way you want to live it (and yes, boundaries play a huge role in that!) Start living unapologetically and totally YOU.

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If you had the proper role models to learn from, setting healthy boundaries would be as natural as breathing. If you didn’t, don’t worry, you can absolutely learn how.

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