Are you ready to transform your life from the inside out? In this episode, we’re diving deep into the foundation of self-love—your core values. Discover how aligning your daily choices with your authentic self can boost your confidence, strengthen your relationships, and help you set healthier boundaries.

We’ll explore practical steps to uncover your true values, let go of external expectations, and build a life rooted in self-love and authenticity. If you’re longing for more clarity, connection, and fulfillment, this episode is your starting point. Tune in now to take the first step toward living with intention and embracing your best self!

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:

Nadja Hagen [00:00:09]:
Are you ready to go? From Am I good enough to wait? Is this even good enough for me? Welcome to the Self Love Sessions podcast.

Nadja Hagen [00:00:19]:
I’m Nadja Hagen, your hostess and Self.

Nadja Hagen [00:00:21]:
Love coach for all your high achieving women recovering from people pleasing and ready to prioritize yourselves. In this show, I share actionable tips and tools to help you set healthy boundaries and prioritize yourself so that you can intentionally build your life aligned with your values and finally build mutual, connected relationships without the need to pretend to be someone you’re not. Let’s Dive into Today’s Episode.

Nadja Hagen [00:00:52]:
Welcome to another episode of the Self Love Sessions podcast. I’m so glad you are here because today we are diving deep into something that is truly foundational for living a life of self love and authenticity. It’s about discovering your core values. This is the first step to not just knowing who you are, but fully embracing and living as your most authentic self. So grab your favorite beverage, find a comfy spot, and let’s explore how identifying your personal values can transform your life from the inside out. By the end of this episode, you will walk away with practical tools to connect with your true self, align your daily choices with your core values, and break free from externally imposed expectations. If this doesn’t sound fabulous, I don’t know. So let’s get started.

Nadja Hagen [00:01:51]:
The first part is about understanding core values. So let’s begin with a simple question. What are core values? Think of your core values as the guiding principles that represent what is most important to you. They are the foundation of self love because when you live in alignment with your personal values, you are honoring your authentic self. But when your actions clash with those values, that’s when you start to feel disconnected, unfulfilled, or even resentful. Core values are deeply personal. They are not something you inherit from society, family or culture or through external influences often try to shape them. Authenticity comes from peeling back those layers of expectations to uncover what truly matters to you.

Nadja Hagen [00:02:46]:
It’s about this is who I am and I’m going to honor that. So here’s your first reflection. If someone asked, what do you stand for? What would you say? Take a moment to think about that. If nothing comes to mind immediately, don’t worry. This episode will help you clarify. So the second part is about identifying your authentic values. Now that we understand the importance of core values, how do we figure out what they are? I’ll walk you through three steps to uncover your authentic values. Step 1 Reflect on peak Experiences Think about moments in your life when you felt truly alive, fulfilled, or super proud of yourself.

Nadja Hagen [00:03:40]:
What was happening? Who were you with? What values were being honored in those moments? Maybe it was courage, creativity, connection, or freedom. Write down whatever comes up and don’t worry about missing important values. Values that don’t pop up that you can’t think of immediately. They’re probably not the ones who were guiding principles for your life, so take it easy on you here. Step 2 Notice what triggers you so sometimes discovering your personal values can come from paying attention to what makes you upset. For example, if you get frustrated when people are dishonest, it might mean you deeply value integrity. Or if being rushed makes you anxious, it could signal a value of patience or mindfulness. These emotional reactions are clues.

Nadja Hagen [00:04:41]:
Step three is prioritizing your list. So once you have brainstormed your values, narrow them down to your top three to five. This might feel overwhelming at first, but ask if I had to choose only a few values to guide my life, which ones would I hold onto no matter what, these are your authentic values, the ones that light you up and ground you in self love. So now let’s look at aligning daily choices with your true self. How does this work? Knowing your core values is powerful, but the magic happens when you start aligning your daily choices with them. This is where self love becomes a practice. Let’s say one of your values is authenticity. How can you make choices that honor that value? Maybe it means speaking up in a meeting instead of staying silent.

Nadja Hagen [00:05:42]:
Maybe it’s saying no to something that doesn’t feel right. Every time you act in alignment with your personal values, you are reinforcing self love. Here is a practical at the end of the day, ask did my actions today align with my values? If the answer is yes, celebrate that. And if the answer is no, approach it with curiosity rather than judgment. What can you do differently tomorrow? What’s the learning of it? Let’s expand on this with an example. Imagine you value connection, but you’ve been so busy with work that you haven’t reached out to loved ones. A small but powerful choice might be scheduling a phone call with a friend or planning a family dinner. These small, intentional actions are how we honor our values in everyday life.

Nadja Hagen [00:06:40]:
Let’s say one of your values is growth. How are you nurturing that value? Maybe it’s signing up for a course, reading a book that challenges your thinking, or even just journaling about lessons you’ve learned recently. Aligning your choices with your values doesn’t have to be complicated. It just has to be intentional. So the fourth part is about Letting Go of External Expectations this part can feel challenging, but also deeply liberating. Many of us grow up absorbing expectations from family, friends and society. We are told who we should be, how we should act, and what we should value. But here’s the Living someone else’s script is the fastest way to lose connection with yourself.

Nadja Hagen [00:07:33]:
Letting go of external expectations requires courage. It might mean disappointing others, setting boundaries, or redefining success on your own terms. But the reward is a life that feels authentic, fulfilling and rooted in self love. And I think that’s absolutely worth it, isn’t it? One way to start is by asking, whose voice is this? When you hear that critical inner dialogue or feel pressure to meet certain standards, pause and reflect. Is this truly your voice? Or is it someone’s else’s? Reclaim your personal values by consciously choosing what feels true for you. Let’s take this further with a visualization exercise. Close your eyes and imagine you are holding two scripts. One script represents the expectations others have placed on you.

Nadja Hagen [00:08:35]:
The other script is blank, waiting for you to write it. Which script am I living from? And what would it feel like to let go of the first one and start writing your own? Another way to let go of expectations is through boundary setting. So for example, if someone’s expectations don’t align with your values, it’s okay to say no. Remember, every time you say no to something that doesn’t serve you, you are saying yes to your authentic self. So now we are coming to the last part and bringing it all together. As we wrap up, let’s recap the three key steps to discovering your core values and live authentically. So the first step is identifying your authentic values by reflecting on your peak experiences, emotional triggers and priorities. The second step is aligning your daily choices with those values to practice self love in action.

Nadja Hagen [00:09:39]:
And that’s so beautiful. The third part is letting go of externally imposed expectations. To live a life that’s true to you. To live a life that’s authentically you. Living in alignment with your core values is not a one time event. It’s a lifelong journey. But every small step you take brings you closer to a life of authenticity, fulfillment and self love. I want to leave you with a challenge this week.

Nadja Hagen [00:10:10]:
Choose one value you have identified and take one action that aligns with it. Maybe it’s having an honest conversation, carving out time for creativity, or simply slowing down to practice mindfulness. Whatever it is, notice how it feels to honor your values. Thank you so much for joining me today. If this episode resonated with you, I love to hear your thoughts. Feel free to connect with me on social media or share this episode with someone who might benefit from it. I would love you to spread the love. And remember, self love starts here with discovering your core values and embracing your authentic self.

Nadja Hagen [00:10:51]:
You’ve got this. Until next time, take care of yourself and keep choosing self love every single day.

Nadja Hagen [00:11:00]:
Thank you for tuning into today’s episode. If you’re ready to dive deeper into setting boundaries, knowing exactly when and how to communicate them so they stick, I’ve got something for you. Head over to nadiahagen.com boundaries checklist and grab your free 8 Steps to Healthy Boundaries checklist for high achieving women so you feel confident in every interaction. This is my thank you for listening and a way to keep supporting you beyond the self love sessions. I can’t wait to chat again in the next episode.